This weekend I finally finished setting up something I’d been talking about for a long time. A Dropbox folder full of all the images, gifs and videos that Twitter and Instagram wouldn’t let me share. I figured offering a “pay what you want” subscription for access would help me afford the storage to hold all of the yumminess.
It was an incredibly hot process, choosing photos I felt the sexiest in, or the filthiest in some cases. I got to go through all of the xxx folders and pick out images and videos I’ve never shared before because they were too graphic. The more I added, the more turned on I became. There were so many layers to my arousal — the act of watching myself masturbate in several videos, listening to each one in case any of them had something ridiculous in the background, hearing my moans of pleasure or pain for close to an hour Sunday morning. Also, knowing I was putting together a “rough draft”, if you will, to present to my partner for approval so his favorites could go in the private Daddy folder was really doing it for me. Then to top it all off, this whole thing was to show off to strangers on the internet! It was a delicious cocktail.
When I got the folder ready to present to him, I found myself a little anxious, maybe a little embarrassed. It isn’t like there is anything there he hasn’t been seeing for years, but this felt different. This was me sending him a folder full of masturbation clips, the movie that we made last New Year’s eve of me going down on him with my unicorn horn and tail, etc. at like noon on a Sunday. It felt pretty vulnerable. Which turned me on even further. There is is no mistaking my exhibitionism kink. It makes me happy, it makes me feel good and it turns me on to turn other people on, AND I felt a great sense of accomplishment for finishing something I started. It all sounds pretty magical and positive to me. ✨